Week 10 – Turning Point

The past few days, what I have gained in weight from eating the comfort foods of the holidays has been more than lost in the cement that is cracking off me!  I can FEEL it, and it feels amazing!

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My family…we will not let cancer steal the joy of our time together!

I am staying at my mom’s lake home, which is the most incredible place of peace for me and everyone I have brought here.  I have had so many awakenings in the last few days here.  I have been desperately desiring to buy this house someday, but my mom recently stepped up the idea of selling it soon, which broke my heart.  My DMP mentions all the money I am going to make  so I can buy this house and keep experiencing all that I love here.  And yet, very little in my Plan of Action was yielding any results towards that goal.

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The view from my mom’s deck.

Sunday, thinking about this, I had the biggest epiphany.  If I want to keep this house, I have to find a way to make it serve a non-profit purpose…give it away to keep it.  I have to find a way to share it with others who need healing and rebuilding of the soul, too.  And then I realized that I WANTED to share it with others!  My mom built this big house with a separate apartment downstairs so family who needed help would have a place.  I wrote in my DMP that part of why I wanted this house was to be close to my mom’s legacy, but I was only thinking financial legacy, because she restarted life at 38 with $10 to her name and amassed enough money to help a lot of people and build this house.  Over the past few years of financial challenges, money and financial security has always been in the forefront of my mind.  I kept thinking “I don’t want to lose this house”, and was thinking about me, my place of solace.  What I was missing is that my mom’s entire legacy, my FAMILY’S entire legacy, isn’t about money, it’s about helping those who need it using what you have.  THAT is the energy this house was built with, and until I opened my channels to fulfill THAT, nothing was going to open up to allow me to keep this house.

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The basement, such a good energy, where I finally started tapping into where I am going again!

After thinking of my several people I brought here with PTSD, including a few former soldiers, who experienced more peace than they’d ever had, I started thinking that this place could serve as an incredible guided retreat for returning soldiers who need help with reconnecting with their potential, just like I am reconnecting to mine in this incredible MKMMA course.  I mentioned it to my mom, and then to my cousin, and they both lit up.  That is SO my mom!  I hadn’t truly had a new creative idea in a long time, the byproduct of shutting down the emotional side and living in survival mode for a couple years.  To come up with this idea that made me feel EXCITED and PURPOSEFUL, and could help others by giving away something I loved instead of hoarding it for myself, well, it felt amazing!  And suddenly, so much started making sense, and I realized everything needed to change.

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